Tomorrow…

… My life will change. For I am choosing to take a big step. I will marry Birdman tomorrow, because I feel we need the commitment, and so does he. For our children. For us. For life.

I have had many nasty comments, and emails, from this blog. I have dealt with them. But tomorrow my life starts new. Completely new. Over. And I feel very positive about this.

My point? Send your nasty emails and comments. Call me names (Todd), or call me out. I will answer. I can be called out, and I am not afraid to answer. I am also not afraid to admit when I am wrong.

And this, I think, is why Birdman and I will work. Because not only is HE not afraid to admit when he is wrong, but neither am I. That, folks, is the bottom line. Truth is only truth as far as you can prove it. TRUTH doesn’t come from something that has no bearings, background, facts, or baseline sensibility.

The truth is, I don’t know what will happen tomorrow, but if I hurt Birdman, I apologize. And he apologizes to me if he hurts me. We are a man and a woman, both so different, but both so willing to make it work.

Tomorrow is a new day. I wish you all a new day. I am lucky. I know this. I hope the same for all of you.

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About Natalie R. Collins

Natalie has more than 30 years writing, editing, proofreading and design experience. She has written 20 books (and counting), has worked for the Sundance Film Festival, and as an investigative journalist, editor, and proofreader. She embraces her gypsy-heart and is following her new free-thinking journey through life. Follow her as she starts over and learns a bunch of life's lessons--some the hard way.
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25 Responses to Tomorrow…

  1. birdman says:

    Down under 12 hours now…I know you are nervous and I know I am too. But you are right this will work…not only do I want and need you in my life, but it will work because we can communicate and we both know we are not perfect. We are both willing to admit our faults and apologize if and when we make a mistake that inadvertantly hurts the other.
    I look forward to spending my life with you…

    And reminding you that suddenly you will become a grandmother times 7 when you say: “I DO”

    Like

  2. aerin says:

    Congratulations! So excited for you both! Have a great time! Without Hawaiian haystacks!! 🙂

    Like

  3. Steve says:

    Getting married on Pioneer Day? I applaud the political statement. And I am shocked that anything was open…

    Best wishes and all that stuff!

    Like

  4. Todd D says:

    Congrats to you both, I enjoy your blog and wish you both happiness in your new commitment!

    Is it weird that I don’t comment much because I don’t want to be mistaken for that other Todd?

    Like

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  6. birdman says:

    Steve, actually it is the 23rd…lol Didn’t want to have it on the 24th…and we know that we can always find fireworks the night after…lol

    Thanks Aerin always enjoy your comments.

    Todd D. I really don’t think there is anyway we could confuse you with the other Todd…but he is nothing new to us, he went to school with us 30 yrs ago…actually, I think he had some seminary classes with Natalie (jk honey)…I know he was well known to my very outspoken ex-mormon Cousin. But, as long as you keep coming back and help us know Natalie is headed in a direction you would like to see her go, that’s good enough.

    Like

  7. Todd D says:

    Well birdman, there is no direction I would like to see her go. She seems happy heading into a future with you and well, that is good enough for me.

    I appreciate her comments, although my take on my previous religion is rather different. For me the church was a huge cultural thing I could not comfortably escape. I never had a testimony regardless of how many times I read and prayed and fasted. Church meetings seemed horribly tedious and Fast and Testimony meeting more often than not made me cringe or laugh which was probably not the effect they were going for. I often sat in meetings and looked around and thought, I can’t be the only one who thinks this is all crazy, right? However, I served my mission, and eventually married in the temple to a dear friend because I did not know how to tell my family I was gay. I always knew and wasn’t ashamed of it. It was just me. But I knew my family would not know how to deal with it.

    I also had the experience when I was a young teenager with my extended family in Utah. I had an uncle who was gay, but not open. He had apparently gone to a bar or club where gay men would often meet, and while leaving, was beaten very badly. Left in a coma with brain damage and my families response was “he should not have been there”. At that time, it seemed to me that my family only condemned my uncle’s behavior, not his attackers. Honestly, I do not know if anyone was caught or persecuted. But I retreated deeper into my closet.

    Finally, after many years in an unhappy marriage, I got divorced, told my family I am gay, and stopped going to church. Such a huge weight lifted off my shoulders and I have finally found peace and freedom. I found this blog a year or so ago and enjoy the posts, although for me the merits of the church and the history are irrelevant, because I never believed them. I never got an answer to my many heartfelt prayers, and in the end, the Plan of Salvation as taught by the church not only has no place for me as a happy gay man, but it something that truly terrifies me with it’s implications. So I am fine with walking away and not looking back. Surprisingly, except for my one brother who hasn’t spoken to me in two years and made it clear I was no longer welcome in his home, my family largely ignores it. Who knows if that will continue, but as someone who was fully prepared for the total loss of my family when they found out I was gay, I am content for the moment not to press the issue.

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  12. The Devil says:

    WAT? Natalie getting married? To a man?
    I just leave this place for a moment and when I get back everything is upside down!!??? DAMN!!

    HEY Mr. Natalie!! GOOD LUCK!! I just can’t imagine that bitch on her pms days, hohohahahehehehihihaahahahaha!!!!

    P.D.1: Can we get that bottom graphic (the bottom border of the website) fixed and showing up in the right place please? It’s getting on my nerves to see it on the left while the whole website is centered!!!!!! (I have OCD)
    P.D.2::Congratulations. Have a good day.

    Like

  13. Kent Winward says:

    Congratulations — It was a wonderful wedding and for me, a bizarre version of family reunion and high school reunion.

    JA and I wish you both the best.

    Like

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  15. STEVE MAYFIELD says:

    NATALIE AND BIRDMAN CONGRATULATIONS AND GOD BLESS!!!

    Like

  16. Hannah says:

    Congrats on getting married! I just finished reading Wives and Sisters and found your blog.

    Like

  17. Cara says:

    Congratulations! I know it will be a wonderful marriage if you both can admit to being wrong sometimes. I can NEVER do that and I have a hell of a time. ha ha ha,

    Like

  18. Birdman says:

    Kent, thanks for being there and enduring all of it…sorry, Natalie said no to the Mayan virgin sacrifice lol

    Like

  19. JulieAnn says:

    No virgin sacrifice?! Why, couldn’t you find one between the two of you? Bwah ha ha ha hah ha!!

    Like

  20. JulieAnn says:

    …and when I say BETWEEN….never mind. Uh, Natalie, press on.

    Like

  21. PattiH says:

    Best wishes to you both!

    Like

  22. Congratulations Natalie and Birdman! Best wishes for a ridiculously happy marriage!

    Like

  23. birdman says:

    Thanks for all the well wishes!!

    JA…she no longer needs to press “on”…or buy new batteries…she has me!

    Like

  24. Congratulations!!! 🙂

    Like

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