From the Mormon Hatemail Bag….

These tickle my funny bone. And I haven’t had such an amusing one in a while. So here, from our NEWEST FRIEND Sarah, we have:

HATE MAIL!!!

> Name: Sarah Johnson
> Email: lazy_baby_girl@xxxxxx.xxx
> Message: Your website and everything in it needs to get a LIFE!!! Get over yourself and stop acting like the Mormon church is evil!! It is a RIDICULOUS accusation and why don\’t you get on some other religion\’s back for ONCE???

Dear LazyBaby,

Technically, my Web site could not GET a life, because it is not a LIVING creature. But you are pretty darn funny, let me tell you. Did you grow up talking in cliches, or is this a recent malady? Are there drugs for this condition? Inquiring minds want to know.

Get over myself about WHAT? Because I write about things that make you uncomfortable? You get over it. You’re the one with the issue.

And as for “it is a ridiculous accusation,” can you tell me WHAT you are referring to? What accusation? Please, be more specific. Do you mean your claim that I said the Mormon Church is evil? Because that would be a blatant LIE, and baseless accusation on your part. That would NEVER do. Surely you wouldn’t accuse me of such, without any basis in fact to stand behind. I never said the Mormon Church was evil. I said I have some issues with the tenets, and I’ve told you why.

Now, as for getting on some “other” religion’s “back,” again, technically, a religion does not HAVE a back, therefore, it would be hard to get on something that doesn’t exist.

Furthermore, what type of Christian are you, that you would wish something you consider a scourge upon some other religious faith? That’s not very Christlike there, Lazy.

I would personally like to thank you for emailing, because it’s been a while since I had one of these silly teenage emails. Please, tell me you are a teenager, because if not, I would hate to hear the dinner conversation around YOUR table.

“You are so stupid.”
“Am not.”
“Are too.”
“Am not.”
“Stupid.”
“I know you are but what am I?”
“Stupid!”
“I know you are but what am I?”

Ah, the lovely mental image….

About Natalie R. Collins

Natalie has more than 30 years writing, editing, proofreading and design experience. She has written 20 books (and counting), has worked for the Sundance Film Festival, and as an investigative journalist, editor, and proofreader. She embraces her gypsy-heart and is following her new free-thinking journey through life. Follow her as she starts over and learns a bunch of life's lessons--some the hard way.
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17 Responses to From the Mormon Hatemail Bag….

  1. Tracy says:

    “Your website and everything in it needs to get a LIFE!!!” Get the paddles ready, CLEAR! (popping noise) Hit the web site again, CLEAR! (more popping noise) Live damn it, LIVE!

    “Get over yourself and stop acting like the Mormon church is evil!!” Who’s acting? (said with my best friends mother’s yiddish accent)

    “It is a RIDICULOUS accusation” At least you correctly spelled ridiculous (Spell check, a gift from God. )

    “and why don\’t you get on some other religion\’s back for ONCE???” (Add monkey noise) Where are the Zoroastrian\’s? No one ever pick\’s on them.

    Like

  2. Renee says:

    Sounds like Lazy Baby’s been nipping at the communion wine…oh wait, she doesn’t get that…maybe the cooking wine. Or too much Nyquil.

    Like

  3. Caryn says:

    LOL! Wonder if she’ll bother to come back and read this. Or did you e-mail a copy of it to her, too?

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  4. Kitty says:

    Natalie, they actually say that a good belly laugh is good for your health. Thanks for giving me mine for the day. What a hoot!

    Like

  5. hee hee hee….

    If it bothers her as much as she says, one wonders why she sticks around?

    Or is the First Amendment not applicable to ex-Mormons?

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  6. Glo says:

    First Amendment maybe, but they just don’t get that everyone is entitled to thier own opinion, even if they don’t agree with it.

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  7. azteclady says:

    They forget that Freedom of Speech means that EVERYONE gets to have their say–not that people have the right not to be offended by what others say.

    By the same token, if what we see or hear in a public venue offends us, we can always move on.

    And in a private venue (like oh say, a blog?) we have the right to stop reading, stop visiting, and forget about the place (or perhaps warn those near and dear about the offensive matter). But NO ONE has the right to tell Natalie what she can/should post in her own little corner of the intrawebs.

    Particularly specific ONES who can’t spell, can’t write, and generally seem unable of critical thinking.

    Like

  8. tex841 says:

    Serious question/point of clarity: Are Prophets born or made by election? How does an election turn someone into a prophet? If the person is a prophet today, how can he not have been one last month? Or 30 years ago?

    Why would God rely on an election to choose his designated speaker? Wouldn’t God simply, ?Tombo, you’re my boy now…F the election. Tell them I said so.”

    How could people assume they know who God wants as a prophet? Seems rather illogical to me.

    Like

  9. Renee says:

    That’s why I’m glad my church doesn’t claim to have a “prophet”. Just a leader. I’ve got the same problem myself.

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  10. Erin says:

    Natalie, this was my first stop when I heard Romney dropped out of the race. I figured you’d be proclaiming your victory of predicting he’d never make it by now!!! BTW, a mormon co-worker told me about her Jesus Jammies today. Isn’t that forbidden? I wonder if I can get her to tell me her “name” next!

    Like

  11. Renee says:

    Yeah, Natalie’s what’s up with the Mittster? One of the radio stations this afternoon was asking “What’s On Mitt’s IPOD” – the first person that called said “Loser” by Beck. And they played it. ILMAO.

    Like

  12. Tracy says:

    I was at YouTube watching videos about Mormonism, both pro and con, and I noticed on the anti Mormon sites, Mormons comment with the same love and respect that they show Natalie.

    Like

  13. Natalie says:

    Yeah, I have been SWAMPED and didn’t get a chance to comment on Mitt! But can I tell you I TOLD YOU SO!!!

    Like

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