TRAPPED IN THE CORRAL: Roundup from Behind the Zion Curtain

I’m just catching wind of this story now, but it happened in early December. (Thanks to Dej, for the heads up.)

A seventh grade girl wrote an essay about her miracle Christmas, and her teacher liked it. She submitted it to a contest in the Deseret News, and it–allegedly–was not chosen. But then the mother received a phone call from an editor at the Desperate News, who liked the essay and wanted to print it. There was a CATCH, though. She asked the girl’s mother, “Are you Mormon?” The answer was no. On both ends. Since the girl was not Mormon, the News would not use the story.

According to a story by Paul Rolly in The Salt Lake Tribune:

Michelle Bliss was thrilled Monday when she received a call telling her that her daughter’s essay about a true Christmas story had been selected to run in a supplement to the Deseret Morning News.
Her elation was short-lived, however. The woman asked whether she was Mormon. When she replied that she was not, the woman apologized and said they were only running essays on Mormon families.
Her daughter, seventh-grader Georgia Clyde, was one of several students whose class essays were sent to the paper by Olympus Junior High School English teacher Jennifer Allred for consideration in its “Christmas I Remember Best” contest.
The essay was not selected, but promotions manager Sharon Johnson sent it to LDS Church News editor Gerry Avant to possibly run in the Church News.
Avant liked the essay and was the one who called Bliss with first the good, then the bad news.
Avant says the LDS Church News is written by and for members of the LDS Church. She said some non-Mormons might be offended to have their work show up in the weekly insert into the Deseret Morning News, which is why she felt she needed to ask the question. But Bliss said she would not have been offended had her daughter’s essay appeared in the publication.

Avant is full of shit. The reason she ASKED if the girl was Mormon, was because she was ONLY INTERESTED in running a story written by a special, Godly, MORMON child. Now in all honesty, the editor WAS looking for essays to print in the LDS Church News, and the LDS Church News GENERALLY does not run stories about Christians, atheists, Muslims, etc., because they ARE the LDS Church News.

Would a non-Mormon want their story published in the LDS Church news? Unless they are a vocal critic of the LDS Church, why wouldn’t they? And the girl even mentioned GOD in her story. Is this a case of saying that the girl’s God was not as good as the Mormon God? How else can you take it? Oh yeah, I remember…. They didn’t want to OFFEND the girl by running her story in the LDS CHURCH NEWS. Hee hee hee. Funny stuff.

No, Mitt, we do NOT want to see your underwear…..

The Washington Post has declared JESUS JAMMIES OUT! Somebody better tell Mitt Romney. It will be interesting to see how he FLIP FLOPS on this one. Will the next picture of him be in a thong, or worse, WITHOUT underwear? Let’s hope he doesn’t try to take a page from the Paris Hilton/Britney Spears/Lindsay Lohan book.

Incidentally, I’m from the generation that called our “flip flops” thongs. My girls die of embarrassment when I accidentally utter that one. I’m trying folks….

And then there is a link to a funny story wherein the reporter tries to find out just exactly WHAT the Jesus Jammies are all about. It’s dated 2002, so I’m guessing it was when the Olympics came to town….


A moment of silence, please…

Ever heard of Postum? Can I just say, YUCK? Well, my mom drank and loved it. I don’t think she’s had it around for many years, but it served as a coffee substitute for the Mormon faithful. Well, Postum is no more, according to a story in The Salt Lake Tribune, written by Kathy Stephenson (a high school friend of mine):

“Basically the overall demand for the product, both on a national and regional level, declined to the point that we decided to discontinue the product,” said Rene Zahery, a spokeswoman for Kraft, which purchased the Post-brand products several years ago.

“Whatever remains in the marketplace is all there is of Postum,” she said.

This is terrible news! Next thing you know, they will stop making Coca Cola, and someone is going to have to scrape all the Mormons off the ceiling. Or spray them with cold water to wake them up. Wouldn’t want THAT job. (Apologies to my mother, who does NOT drink the evil Coca Cola, in any form, although she loves her some hot cocoa).


People across America are currently asking themselves this question: Can Mitt Romney govern this country without his faith intervening? They might want to read this very interesting, and very alarming, story. Former Utah Governor Mike Leavitt, now serving as HHS secretary, used to have early morning “Seminary” meetings.

Former Utah governor and current Cabinet secretary Mike Leavitt sought to infuse the lessons of his religion into his inaugural address and into state policy, conducting a series of “Early Morning Seminary” classes in which he and top advisers discussed how to incorporate “just and holy” Mormon principles into his governance, archival records show.

This alone signifies the COLD HARD TRUTH. There IS no separation of church and state in Utah. This, people, is called PROOF. It’s not surprising. But still… PROOF.

Over several mornings in late 1996, the group delved into the Book of Mormon and Doctrine and Covenants, exploring the lessons from Mormon scripture and how they apply to modern government.

Can Mitt be any different? It will be interesting to see what the American people think about that. Currently, the answer is 50-50. Sorta. If one can compare the Iowa caucus, where Huckabee beat Romney, to the Wyoming caucus, where Huckabee was less than a gnat buzzing in Romney’s ear.

And that, folks, is your BZC roundup.


About Natalie R. Collins

Natalie has more than 30 years writing, editing, proofreading and design experience. She has written 20 books (and counting), has worked for the Sundance Film Festival, and as an investigative journalist, editor, and proofreader. She embraces her gypsy-heart and is following her new free-thinking journey through life. Follow her as she starts over and learns a bunch of life's lessons--some the hard way.
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10 Responses to TRAPPED IN THE CORRAL: Roundup from Behind the Zion Curtain

  1. mlbower says:

    The Jesus Jammies report was bound to happen. Oprah had the creator of Spanx on her show and she didn’t mention anything about the sacred garments on her list of favorite things.


  2. Caryn says:

    Crazy. The story about the little girl with the essay was especially weird. If the editor had to call and verify the girl’s faith, then he probably couldn’t tell from the story that the girl wasn’t Mormon. Therefore, their general audience would probably not be able to tell. Which means that they would have found it just as inspiring as if the girl *had* been Mormon. Which in turn means that the girl *and* the paper’s readers all missed out because of this. I mean, come on. What’s the harm of printing the thing if it would have had the desired effect at the end? Or was the fear that the girl’s story, which was not obviously non-LDS, would have polluted the entire newspaper?


  3. Caryn says:

    P.S. It would have been better PR for the church and the paper not to have called the girl at all, or not to have let her know that religion was the reason they weren’t running it. With that action, they probably planted a seed of bitterness in the girl and her parents, one that may spread as the story is related to others. It was a really stupid move on behalf of the church, in my opinion.


  4. azteclady says:

    Wouldn’t it be lovely if another paper published both the girl’s essay *and* an account of the whole mess? *wicked grin*


  5. Cele says:

    Very sad and it makes me wonder how Mormons who know about this turn of events feel about it. Shock, dismay, indifference, justified? I just wonder, I’m sure the teacher who sent the essays in never gave her religion any thoughts. And like Caryn said who would have knowns. Hmmm I seem to quote Caryn a lot these days.


  6. Natalie says:

    That’s okay, Cele. Caryn is a good person to quote!

    And azteclady, FUNNY! LOL.


  7. Renee says:

    I remember a letter to the Trib that said something to the effect of “if you think a Mormon’s faith won’t have any impact on how he governs, take a look at the laws in this state.”



  8. kd says:

    Most of the companies I’ve been with call the local ward when they intend to discrimate on religion. I am really surprised that calling the ward isn’t standard procedure at the Deseret News.

    My guess is that the reporter was calling to verify other information when it dawned on her that the family may not be Mormon, and that the call was not specifically set up to check the religion of girl.


  9. Kathleen says:

    Awwww….I like Postum! Well, at least there’s Caf-Lib.


  10. ct says:

    There is always PERO!


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