I do. Because being mean and nasty never really got anyone anywhere, except maybe temporarily ahead in life until karma catches up with you. But sometimes, SOME PEOPLE, just TEST YOUR PATIENCE until you have none left, and you just have to let loose.
For example, I give you THIS comment by Wayne, the faithful, Kool-aid drinking, Jesus-Jammie wearing, MORMON.
Now Wayne has irritated me in the past, but don’t feel bad faithful Mormons. Compared to the irritation I feel, I am a BURR UNDER HIS JESUS JAMMIES RIGHT NEXT TO HIS…well, you know…. It’s a constant itch that the man SWEARS he is going to go to the doctor and fix (aka, leave this blog and never, ever, ever, EVER EVER come back again), but he just can’t. The truth is, Wayne is a highly addicted Trappee. He LOVES me. He comes back again and again and again, usually to tell you all how I am going to lead people into violence against Mormons (Wayne, if ANYONE could lead people into violence against Mormons, it’s YOU! Right now, hordes of people are trying to find out your address just so they can drive to your house, unhook your modem or DSL connection, and take you to the nearest TRAPPED rehab center.)
Or perhaps, Wayne’s family is right now forming a good old fashioned plan for a TRAPPED INTERVENTION. PUT DOWN THE MOUSE, WAYNE, and step away from the computer.
Wayne’s latest nugget of wisdom is this:
August 16th, 2007 at 1:00 pm
I was thinking: If Natalie WERE to get her name off of the records of the Church, (which I don’t think she does), it would upset the premise of her web-site.
What I mean for instance is:
What would she then call her web-site? Maybe something like: “Un-trapped by the Mormons”, or maybe “Finally!! Released from the Mormons”. Or maybe “Free at last from the Mormons”.
Then if it were to happen: What would she then write about? She would then be different from all the other “Trapped Mormons” who love to spend their time defending her with their blogs, to help her put down all of us mean Mormons.
She would rather spend hours, days, weeks, months and years writing about her trials of being “Trapped by the Mormons”, rather than take a comparative small amount of time writing a 30 min letter to the church reminding them of the former efforts. It might even take making a copy of the same letter she posted on this web-site and sending it to Church headquarters.
Um, Wayne????? I DID request my name off, REMEMBER. Did you read and COMPREHEND any little tiny bit of what I wrote? Johnny did. For all his comments, Mormon Johnny has said time and time again that the issue of Mormon Church resignation lies with the CHURCH. The problem is on their end, and many members of the church, like Johnny, are frustrated with the system. He has suggested I try to call this problem to the attention of the media. I am doing that. Go Johnny! Can I call you Johnny Lingo? Oh wait, I’m showing my age, aren’t I?
But Wayne? Wayne says, “I was thinking: If Natalie WERE to get her name off of the records of the Church, (which I don’t think she does), it would upset the premise of her web-site.”
Wayne? I’m thinking THINKING is bad for you. Perhaps it would be better if you DIDN’T think. Because even while thinking, your sentence structure is so poor it makes no sense. “If Natalie WERE to get her name off of the records of the Church, (Which I don’t think she does), it would upset the premise of her web-site.” You don’t think I do WHAT??? You don’t think I get my name off the records of the Church? You right. I don’t. It no workee.
My Web site, as azteclady pointed out, is www.nataliercollins.com. You are reading my blog, or online journal, which I have VERY tongue-in-cheek-ly entitled, Trapped by the Mormons. This title, which I would LOVE to have come up with on my own, is borrowed from a very old, very campy silent movie. It’s JUST FUNNY, Wayne. Get a sense of humor. Borrow one if you have to, because you really need it.
As a WRITER, I WRITE about lots of things. I write books about dance and crazy psycho dance moms, and those are mysteries. I write about serial killers who have never met Mormons, and those are suspense fiction. And I write SUSPENSE BOOKS set in Utah, in the culture I grew up in. I own the right to WRITE about my right to WRITE. For my next book, I am thinking of proposing a book about serial killers who have never met Mormons, but happen upon my blog, and swear a vendetta against all Mormons based SOLELY ON WAYNE’S COMMENTS. Whew. I must have been channeling Wayne there or something.
And when is the last time I wrote about a MEAN MORMON???? Hmmm?? Just point it out, Wayne. The LAST PERSON WHO WROTE ABOUT A MEAN MORMON on this blog was, well, YOU, in the comments, when you wrote about the whackjob who attacked his hometeachers and then you tried to imply that I was responsible for his violence. HE WAS A MEAN MORMON. My Mormons are just silly.
FYI, I have three blogs. This one, www.murdershewrites.com, and jennytpartridge.wordpress.com. I know you’ll be sad, Wayne, but I only write about MORMONS in this one. That means I spend more than a few hours not writing about Mormons. Sorry to disappoint.
I WRITE, Wayne. I have contract with THREE DIFFERENT NEW YORK PUBLISHERS. I write three blogs. I help friends write resumes. I help my Mormon dad write up all kinds of things. I ARE WRITER. Er. eh, sorry, channeling Wayne again.
I suggest YOU GET A GRIP, Wayne, and either stay away or learn to deal with my acerbic style. As it is, you give me a lot of fodder, and you don’t seem to realize that. I could do a blog a week on your comments. I could call it, Wayne’s World, yet another title that I sadly did not BRILLIANTLY think up. All the best ideas are already taken.
There. Now I feel better.
FYI, copy of letter went to Bishop S. of “my ward,” along with a copy to Church HQ. Will keep all posted. And give it up, Wayne. Even if they finally do take my name off, I’m not going to change the title, because it is DAMN FUNNY.
Now, let’s hope they find those miners alive.