The Magic Eight Ball

Sometimes, I get really perplexing emails, and it’s hard to know how to answer them.

I decided that perhaps a Magic Eight Ball approach would work best. For example, consider this one:

>Name: doesn’t matter
>Message: do you really get trapped by the “Mormon people”??? you are quite dramatic about it. they sound like awful people.

Um, Signs point to yes.

Don’t like that answer? I’ll shake it one more time.

Hmm. Ask again later.

Now, I have a few questions for the old Magic Eight Ball myself.

Isn’t it kind of stupid to put “doesn’t matter” in the contact name of your email when your NAME is your email address?

The MEB says:

It is decidedly so.

Isn’t it fairly apparently this email was sent by a Mormon (possibly semi-illiterate or non-English speaking) who wanted me to feel stupid about my “drama,” and also attempted some irony by saying “they sound like awful people?”

MEB says: It is certain.

Wow, amazing how that works….


About Natalie R. Collins

Natalie has more than 30 years writing, editing, proofreading and design experience. She has written 20 books (and counting), has worked for the Sundance Film Festival, and as an investigative journalist, editor, and proofreader. She embraces her gypsy-heart and is following her new free-thinking journey through life. Follow her as she starts over and learns a bunch of life's lessons--some the hard way.
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8 Responses to The Magic Eight Ball

  1. Also Trapped says:

    Those magic eight balls are almost as good as the Holy Ghost!


  2. Cele says:

    A good thing to resort to the unfailing wisdom of the Magic Eight Ball or we’d be worried


  3. Also, So glad you NOTICED! He he he. I was going to add that to my post, but decided to let it go, and see if anyone made that connection….


  4. Also Trapped says:

    But can your MEB send a shiver down your spine, or speak to you in a still, small voice? Gotcha! To match the decisive level of the Spirit, you’ll need to step up to a full-fledged Ouija board, or at least some New Age crystals. But you can’t buy the HG at a game store, the Mormons have a patent on it. Anyway, with all this talk of Magic, Ghosts, and Spirits, I’m really getting in the mood for Halloween!


  5. Caryn says:

    Was this post hilarious! It is decidedly so.


  6. desi says:

    You know Natalie,
    some people really are just that…ahem…stupid


  7. LOL…

    I want a Magic 8 Ball.


  8. Natalie says:

    There are days when I really love this job….


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