FrankenKitten is born….

Well, it’s official. The offspring of FrankenTom and StepfordKat has been born. Apparently, it’s a girl, although for a while today, it was up in the air just exactly WHAT they had given birth to. Given Tom’s leanings toward scientology, and his opinion that God at some point sucked out his brain, filled it with all the higher knowledge and power of the universe and then replaced it, I half expected some advanced version of the Stepford wife Katie Holmes has become, except with the ability to shoot laserbeams from her eyeballs and cure severe depression just by saying, YOU ARE NOT DEPRESSED. IT’S A CONSPIRACY. YOU JUST NEED VITAMINS.

I could yet be proved right.

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About Natalie R. Collins

Natalie has more than 30 years writing, editing, proofreading and design experience. She has written 20 books (and counting), has worked for the Sundance Film Festival, and as an investigative journalist, editor, and proofreader. She embraces her gypsy-heart and is following her new free-thinking journey through life. Follow her as she starts over and learns a bunch of life's lessons--some the hard way.
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18 Responses to FrankenKitten is born….

  1. Howy says:

    So, it’s all religion that you despise . . . not just Momos?!? Or just the stupid religions. Oops . . . oxymoron. Is there such a thing as an oxymormon? I’m confused now.

    Inthenameoftheosmondsamen,
    Howy

    Like

  2. Cele says:

    Ha, ha, ha….I hope someone holds an intervention for that poor baby. Now if someone could suck out FrankenTom’s brains and leave it at that the world would be a better place. Ugh, he makes my skin crawl.

    Like

  3. Natalie says:

    I do NOT despise all religions. Tom Cruise, on the other hand, has become this CARICATURE of all the bad that can happen if you think you are not in control of your actions and ascribe to a higher power. It’s mostly the Tom thing I have an issue with. Come on, admit it. YOU know he’s become a whackjob.

    Like

  4. Natalie says:

    And I just have to say that having seen pictures of Katie in various stages of pregnancy progress that something is AMISS and I mean SERIOUSLY amiss in this whole charade.

    Either they were padding her belly and then not padding it to confuse people, or the entire thing has been sham.

    Like

  5. azteclady says:

    Scientology is scary as hell -talk about your regular mass-hysteria cult! And yes, as time goes by, Tom Cruise has gotten scarier. Poor kid!

    Like

  6. Howy says:

    Why is it the whack-jobs are the only ones that get media attention? Okay, it’s rhetorical. I wonder how the sales of Kool-Aid changed after Jimmy’s party?

    I know you don’t depise ALL religions. Pushing that button is just so much fun.

    Yesterday, I saw a car fish sticker above another sticker, with a lil fish in it’s belly, atop another lil fish. All stuck on a SUV rear window facing right. Made me wanna hurl. This freedom of speech thing is really out of hand!

    Inthenameoftheosmondsamen,
    Howy

    Like

  7. Natalie says:

    Howy, Howy, Howy–in this instance, you just need to ask yourself? What Would Donny Do?

    Like

  8. Howy says:

    Marie. Oh . . . did I say that out loud?!

    Inthenameoftheosmondsamen,
    Howy

    Like

  9. Natalie says:

    eeewwwwwwwww. Yes, you did. Yuck.

    Like

  10. Howy says:

    It is Utah.

    Howy

    Like

  11. LOL… ummm so where do Mormon’s go to find mates? Their family reunion of course.

    Adapted from a redneck joke. 😉

    Like

  12. Howy says:

    . . . or the other room.

    Howy

    Like

  13. Karin says:

    Hey! I love Donny. There, I said it.
    Go Away Little Girl…
    It’s not just puppy luuuaave…
    OK, so I have a problem.

    Like

  14. Elaine says:

    Will someone please explain to me the fascination with Tom Cruise? I mean, seriously, what is the deal? He isn’t that attractive. He can’t act (“Born on the Fourth of July” was either an aberration or he was possessed by the spirit of an actual actor at the time). And when they sucked out his brain, they apparently only put about a tenth of it back in. As far as I can see, whackjob doesn’t even begin to cover it. Yet every time I saw a tv yesterday and the day before, somebody was talking about that birth as if it were the second coming. Although I did like the bit Olbermann did on “Countdown”, making fun of the whole thing.

    Oh, and thanks so much, Howy, for that mental picture. Ick.

    Like

  15. Howy says:

    That’s right – it’s my fault. It’s okay, I’ve been married a couple of times, I know the drill. I’m so sorry for causing your unhappy mental picture and I promise never to do it again.

    Intehnameoftheosmondsandwhinywomenamen,
    Howy

    Like

  16. Natalie says:

    Hey Elaine, let me tell you, I WISH FrankenTom would just fade from memory. FREE KATIE!!!! FREE FRANKENKITTEN!!!

    Howy, play nice, or your sandbox privileges will be removed…. LOL.

    Like

  17. Elaine says:

    Free Katie and Free Frankenkitten, indeed. I still think Katie didn’t realize what she was getting into and will someday have this a-ha moment and break out. If she is able to by then.

    The thing is, it isn’t just Mr. Jump-on-the-Couch. I don’t understand the whole celeb-mania thing. Perhaps it has to do with the fact that I grew up in southern California and had industry folks as neighbors from time to time, went to school with kids whose parents were in the business, and seeing celebrities in the grocery store or the mall was not at all a rare occurrence. Because of this, I know they’re not any different from the rest of us. Well, richer sometimes, but that’s the extent of it. So this fascination with the lives of these people seems just seems a little odd to me.

    Like

  18. Howy says:

    Very true about the celebs. Usually they appear smaller in real life. Met a few and see lots of them around in So Cal. Seem to be quite nice. There is always a nut or two in any group.

    Tom’s problem stems back to the tightie-whities he was sporting in Risky Business. Diminished blood flow to the control center. Very risky business. Surprised he was able to jump on the couch that way. Very restricting.

    Inthenameoftheosmondsamen,
    Howy

    Like

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